From "The Face of Seung-Hui Cho," an essay by Wesley Yang published in the winter 2008 issue of n+1:

I had come to New York five years earlier, to create a life for myself there. I had not created a life for myself there. I had wanted to find the emerging writers and thinkers of my generation. I had found the sycophants, careerists, and media parasites who were redefining mediocrity for the 21st century. I had wanted to remain true to myself as a writer, and also to succeed; I wanted to be courageous and merciless in defense of the downtrodden, and I wanted to be celebrated for it. This was a naive and puerile desire and one that could not be realized -- at least not by me, not in this world.

This is a depressingly accurate description of my aspirations, circa age 18 -- and yes, in moments of weakness, circa age 26.

 


Comments

Jade

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 08:12:07

You have to remember to dream through the noise.

 



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